These last few weeks have been just going through and I have gone to Dar and back and gone again and I am just wondering what happened to my life. Did I have any or do I have it now? Do I want to achieve more in life or just go with the flow and what is my purpose here again? I don't feel anything much these days, and to be honest, I could be angry but then to whom would it benefit…? The one with whom I am angry, would be angry too and the chain reaction would be started… on the other hand, the one with whom I am angry could be getting some kind of happiness on looking at me being angry… so that wouldn't be fair too.
I don't know anymore what I want… I am living my life just as I expected it to be some 2 years ago, that I would be having no boyfriends or a man in my life which is okay for now as I live here in this small city..LOL City??? and there is nothing to it even… not even a cinema hall where one could play new movies or a place for recreational purposes… I meant a volleyball ground or a swimming pool or a basketball place….! All I can see is so many bars mushrooming and people just being intoxicated by early evening. Is this what it comes it living in a small city like this? Yes I do have a choice but that is limited too… and yes I do have a choice to make my life better…. BUT to be honest, I AM JUST TIRED.
Reminder :
ReplyDeletewell. cant believe that its 2010 and I have been off Prozac for now a few weeks nearing a month soon. I guess I did take it bad and to know that I actually didn't need it in the first place. I guess, I was trying to find an easy way out… but realized before it was too late.
2010, brings new challenges for me and i guess I am ready to accept them…
Shaffin we get into up and downs circle and if we r wise enough we wont stay in the downward part and pull ourself to the upward carve by new goals discovering new stuff discovering ourself more and what we can give and more or less from time to time we need to recharge our power to be able to go on .... joe